Archive for the ‘screenplay writing’ tag

Navigating Act Two

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Many new screenwriters despair the second act. But by focusing on the elements that make up Act II, and understanding the main character’s internal needs, a writer can effectively navigate this section of the script with ease.

GRACE PERIOD
Once the protagonist has climbed to the summit of the MidPoint, there is often what is referred to as a Grace Period, where the hero is rewarded for his discovery with a period of happiness, free of conflict and struggle.

Though not found in all scripts, the Grace Period benefits a story:

* It provides a rest from the unrelenting tension building up to the MidPoint – allowing the protagonist and the audience a moment to “breath”.

* It provides an opportunity to show a renewed, invigorated protagonist and his potential to achieve the goal.

* It provides a glimpse of what the future can be if the hero achieves his goal.

FREE FALLIN’
Everything seems peachy-keen during the Grace Period, but there are still unresolved complications. In order for real transformation to occur, the hero must act on his new discovery, which will present additional challenges the protagonist must face to achieve the goal.

After the Grace Period, the hero begins a rapid free-fall descent. During this downward spiral, things fall apart for the hero – usually the result of the protagonist falling back on old behaviors. There is often a conflict or struggle between the old-self and the emerging new-self.

CRISIS
Change comes from the hero’s own undoing – letting go of the old-self and embracing the new. And it’s not an easy process, which leads us to the Crisis (or the “death experience”) and the Second Turning Point. The Crisis is the worst possible thing that can happen to the protagonist. This external event directly relates to the hero’s internal struggle.

In the film Silence of the Lambs, the protagonist Clarice Starling’s internal need is to alleviate her guilt and loss by catching Buffalo Bill and saving Catherine Martin. At the Midpoint she begins collaborating with Lector and receives information (enlightenment; discovery) that puts her on the path to achieving her goal. What’s the worst thing that can happen to Clarice? To feel guilt and loss because she is unable to save a victim and take down the bad guy. Clarice’s crisis moment occurs when Lector escapes custody and Clarice faces the real possibility that she won’t be able to save Catherine without Lector’s help.

With an understanding of the protagonist’s inner struggle, a writer can develop external situations that effectively challenge the hero – making the Second Act an energized and engaging component of the script, and not the unfocused, desolate landscape many new writers encounter.

Already completed your first draft? Looking for professional guidance to ensure a productive rewrite? I offer comprehensive script evaluation, including an analysis and diagnosis of a script’s weaknesses, detailed development notes to solve underlying problems and enhance the script’s natural strengths, and a story map to guide you effectively and efficiently through the revision process.

The Importance of the MidPoint

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The midpoint is the “high” before the fall. It provides a breakthrough point for the hero, a shift in the dramatic conflict, and relief from the relentless resistance of the first half of the second act.

WHAT’S GOING ON AT THE MIDPOINT?

As the story moves into the second act, the hero tries to solve the problem and achieve his goal in the easiest possible way – and he fails. So he makes another attempt, and he fails again. He tries something different and still he fails. With each attempt he is faced with mounting obstacles, increasing complications, and rising conflict. No matter what he does, he is unable to achieve his goal.

When the hero hits the midpoint he is exhausted. He has reached a breaking point, which allows him to experience a breakthrough. Similar to the first and second turning points, the incident or event at the midpoint creates a dramatic shift. The protagonist’s internal reaction to this event helps him understand how his fatal flaw is impacting the conflict and preventing him from reaching his goal – and the hero begins to discover how the conflict can be resolved.

In other words, the protagonist can now see the light at the end of the tunnel and how to reach it. The midpoint event may make the hero reconsider who he is and what he believes in. It forces him to re-evaluate his strategy. It motivates him to take a new approach to the problem. The midpoint clarifies and reveals the theme (through the protagonist’s actions and reactions) and shows the hero embracing and moving toward that truth.

Robert Towne creates a classic midpoint revelation in the screenplay Chinatown. Midway through the story, Jake figures out the water department is siphoning off water and redirecting it. In this scene, Gittes goes from being both literally and figuratively unconscious (when he’s knocked out) to being enlightened (when he “comes to”). The revelation causes the hero to formulate a new plan; he now knows what to do to begin solving the mystery.

YOUR TURN: What incident occurs midway through your story that shifts the conflict and sets the protagonist on a new path? Does your midpoint effectively clarify and reveal the theme?

Already completed your first draft? Looking for professional guidance to ensure a productive rewrite? I offer comprehensive script evaluation, including an analysis and diagnosis of a script’s weaknesses, detailed development notes to solve underlying problems and enhance the script’s natural strengths, and a story map to guide you effectively and efficiently through the revision process.

Act Two – How To Fix Common Problems

Most problems in Act Two result from:

1. Lack of Focus
The story lacks clarity or wanders off course causing the reader to become confused about what is going on and why.

2. Insufficient Momentum
There’s not enough energy – the story drags and stalls out instead of moving forward.

TIPS FOR FIXING ACT II PROBLEMS:

1. Develop a Solid Structure & Present a Clear Set Up In Act One
A solid foundation (including all the necessary components, turning points, crisis, and so on) and a clear, focused direction keep the story on track allowing the reader or audience to easily follow along as Act Two unfolds.

2. Create a Strong First Turning Point
A strong first turning point will go a long way to help push the movement forward as the story enters the second act.

3. Use Action
It goes-without-saying (but I’ll say it anyway), you want to keep your characters acting instead of talking – use complications, obstacles, and reversals to infuse Act II with energy.

4. Keep Your Three Storylines Progressing
The A (external problem), B (internal conflict), and C (relationship issue) storylines should continue to develop – but not be resolved until Act III.

5. Use Cause-and-Effect Scenes
Cause-and-effect scenes – A happens and causes B to result, which then causes C, and on and on – create conflict and action, and give the story direction and momentum.

6. Design Scene Sequences for Clarity and Movement
A sequence is a series of scenes (usually two to five) that are linked together and build toward a common goal. Linking related scenes that rise in tension creates momentum and keeps the second act moving forward.

YOUR TURN: Are there areas in Act II where you can substitute action points for dialogue? Are you using scene sequences to add energy to the second act? Is the story focused or does it wander? Does the first turning point pull the reader into the second act and create momentum? Are the A, B, and C storylines progressing throughout Act II?

Already completed your first draft? Looking for professional guidance to ensure a productive rewrite? I offer comprehensive script evaluation, including an analysis and diagnosis of a script’s weaknesses, detailed development notes to solve underlying problems and enhance the script’s natural strengths, and a story map to guide you effectively and efficiently through the revision process. Want to learn how to write your first script or adapt a book into a screenplay? I’m committed to helping you achieve your writing goals. My online writing classes provide a focused structure and assignments that produce tangible results.

Creating A Strong Goal For Your Main Character

I often read screenplays in which the main character lacks a clear, understandable, and compelling goal that drives the conflict, forces transformation, and pushes the hero toward the climax – which leads to a story that wanders and an audience or reader who quickly becomes bored or confused. The main character needs to have an objective to pursue.

A STRONG GOAL….

IS DRIVEN BY CLEAR & FOCUSED MOTIVATION
The protagonist must be motivated to act to achieve a goal. This motivation can be psychological, physical, or situational, but the audience must clearly understand the motivation. If a reader wonders, “Why is he doing that?” then the character’s motivation has not been established. Frequently, the motivating factor is defined in the inciting incident, when the protagonist is at a crisis point and his entire world is about to change. Something happens that compels the hero to develop a goal and a plan to achieve it.

IS CLEARLY PRESENTED & EASY TO UNDERSTAND
The audience needs to know early in the story (some time in the First Act) what the protagonist’s goal is so they can follow him on his journey. Something may happen later in the story (often around the MidPoint) that forces him to change his goal to what he truly wants or need. For example, in The Verdict, written by David Mamet, the main character’s initial (external) goal is to win the civil case for his client, ultimately the goal shifts and becomes his (internal) need to regain his dignity.

IS COMPELLING
Something must be at stake in the story that is essential to the protagonist’s well being. The audience must be convinced that if the protagonist does not achieve his goal something will be lost (the girl, life on Earth, justice, redemption…)

REQUIRES ACTION TO ACHIEVE
The main character must have a plan and take specific actions to achieve his goal. If he or she doesn’t take action then the audience won’t believe the goal is important to the character and will lose interest. By the MidPoint (at the latest) the hero needs to be acting on the story, instead of his “world” acting on him.

BRINGS THE HERO INTO CONFLICT WITH THE ANTANGONIST
The protagonist’s goals are in direct opposition to the antagonist’s, which creates conflict. A worthy opponent strengthens the hero.

IS DIFFICULT TO ACHIEVE & FORCES THE HERO TO CHANGE
As the character acts to achieve his goal he will face increasingly difficult obstacles, conflicts, and complications that demand the character to confront and overcome his fatal flaw. In most films, the goal cannot be achieved without the hero changing or transforming in some way.

YOUR TURN: What is your main character’s initial goal and does it change later in the story? What is the motivation that compels your protagonist to develop a goal? Are the stakes high enough to sustain the goal throughout the story? What actions does the hero take to achieve the goal? What fatal flaw prevents him from reaching his goal and how is he forced to confront and overcome that obstacle?

Already completed your first draft? Looking for professional guidance to ensure a productive rewrite? I offer comprehensive script evaluation, including an analysis and diagnosis of a script’s weaknesses, detailed development notes to solve underlying problems and enhance the script’s natural strengths, and a story map to guide you effectively and efficiently through the revision process. Want to learn how to write your first script or adapt a book into a screenplay? I’m committed to helping you achieve your writing goals. My online writing classes provide a focused structure and assignments that produce tangible results.

Understanding What Motivates Your Characters’ Actions

In real life, people act with a reason. And screenplay characters need to do the same. Every character action requires motivation and intention. To create a logical story with strong, identifiable, and understandable characters, a writer needs to be aware of what drives his or her characters’ actions, and create behavior that is consistent with the characters he/she has developed.

So, what motivates your characters to do, say, react, and think as they do?

1. Previous Incidents or Backstory
Past events can influence a character’s actions. In Aliens, the character of Ripley distrusts the “synthetic person”, Bishop, because she previously had a bad experience with a robot (a really bad experience). Ripley’s driven to protect the young child Newt, because she lost the opportunity to mother her own child. How do past incidents or backstory influence your character’s behavior and choices?

2. The Unconscious Dark Side
No one is “all good” or always does the “right thing”. The unconscious dark side of a character can drive him to act in ways that go against his conscious self, whether it be as small as a little white-lie to avoid hurting a loved one’s feelings or as significant as bilking clients out of millions of dollars. What makes the police officer, devoted to justice and helping the vulnerable, take a bribe or look the other way at corruption within his department? The law-abiding, good, decent, and loving father in the film In The Bedroom is driven to kill his son’s murderer in an attempt to alleviate his wife’s suffering. What would make your character lie, cheat, steal, or even kill?

3. How A Character Gains and Processes Information
People experience life differently. Some gain information through direct experience, while some derive information through others’ experiences (note that in films your main characters will most often experience life directly). Some people process information emotionally and base their decisions on feelings, while others process information intellectually and base their decisions on principles and facts. How does your character gain and process information and how does that affect his actions?

4. Personality Disorders or Quirks
Woody Allen’s characters often suffer from neuroses that motivate their behaviors and attitudes. In Lethal Weapon, Martin Riggs’s depression influences his actions – including his willingness to take chances and his flirtations with suicide – and causes conflict with other characters, such as his partner, Murtaugh, who questions Riggs’s sanity (Riggs’s depression is a personality disorder triggered by a past event – his wife’s death). What personality disorders or quirks would explain your characters’ behaviors and choices?

Knowing what drives and motivates your characters’ actions will help you create fully developed, plausible characters, and a solid, logical storyline.

YOUR TURN: What techniques do you use to develop and support your characters’ behaviors and actions?

Already completed your first draft? Looking for professional guidance to ensure a productive rewrite? I offer comprehensive script evaluation, including an analysis and diagnosis of a script’s weaknesses, detailed development notes to solve underlying problems and enhance the script’s natural strengths, and a story map to guide you effectively and efficiently through the revision process. Want to learn how to write your first script or adapt a book into a screenplay? I’m committed to helping you achieve your writing goals. My online writing classes provide a focused structure and assignments that produce tangible results.

Friday Q&A: The Correct Use Of Dashes

Q: I have a question about punctuation in scripts, specifically the dash. I understand it is used in dialogue for interruptions, and also when a thought changes suddenly. I have even seen it used in action and description as well. It always seems to consist of two hyphen marks with a space before and after. From what I’ve read it should be used for emphasis or when several related items need to stand apart from one another. But I’m still a bit confused. Can you identify and show examples of how the dash is most commonly used in dialogue, action, and description? – Robert Hosking

A: Thanks for your question Robert. Generally, punctuation rules are the same for any type of writing (you may see a few variations based on which manual an editor uses, for example the Associated Press or The Chicago Manual of Style).

When it comes to the dash, there are two types of dashes, the em-dash and the en-dash. The en-dash is the width of the letter “n” and the em-dash is the width of the letter “m”. The em-dash can be written as one long extended dash (–) or two single dashes (–), always with a space before and after.

The en-dash is used to designate a range or when one part of an open compound is made up of two words, such as:
“I work from 8-5 every day.”
“The score was 3-1 at halftime.”
“Robert is an Academy Award-winning screenwriter.” (Note that the en-dash signifies the inclusion of Academy in the open compound, whereas a hyphen only includes the joined words.)

The em-dash is used most often to indicate emphasis or interruption. Commas and parenthesis are also used to enclose parenthetical elements. The difference is em-dashes mark a sharper disruption than commas and parenthesis indicate a still sharper one than em-dashes. The em-dash is also used for attribution (such as the usage above attributing Robert Hosking to today’s question) and as part of each slugline. Writing a well-structured, compelling script is the goal – so don’t get too hung up on em-dashes.

Some screenwriters use em-dashes more than others. Shane Black (Lethal Weapon) may be the king of em-dashes when it comes to using them in description and action lines.

EXT. SIMI VALLEY – MORNING
The scorched landscape stretches out beneath a latticework of high-tension power lines. Only scrub grass grows here. Rusted railroad tracks wander into the distance, and nestled beside them, like the last stop before death — sits a lonely trailer home. Battered TV antenna. A dirt yard, which houses a beat-up pickup truck. Dead garden sprouting weeds. The ground begins to tremble … like an earthquake, RATTLING the POWER POLES, as, without warning — An express TRAIN BLASTS BY and streaks past the trailer at seventy miles an hour.

INT. HIGH-RISE APARTMENT – NIGHT
Through billowing curtains, into the inner sanctum of a penthouse apartment, and here, boys and girls, is where we lose our breath, because — spread-eagled on a sumptuous designer sofa lies the single most beautiful GIRL in the city.

She stands, stumbles across the room, pausing to glance at a photograph on the wall: Two men. Soldiers. Young, rough-hewn, arms around each other.

The Girl throws open the glass doors … steps out onto a balcony, and there, beneath her, lies all of nighttime L.A. Panoramic splendor. Her hair flies, her expression rapt, as she stands against this sea of technology. She is beautiful.

On the balcony railing beside her stand three potted plants. The Girl sees them, picks one up. Looks over the balcony railing … It is ten stories down to the parking lot. She squints, holds the plant over the edge.

GIRL
Red car.

Drops the plant. Down it goes, spiraling end over end — until, finally … BAM — ! SHATTERS. Dirt flies. A red Chevy is now minus a WINDSHIELD. The Girl takes another plant.

GIRL
Green car.

She drops it. Green Dodge. Ten stories below, BAM. Impact city. Scratch one paint job. Grabs the final plant and holds it out

GIRL
Blue car.

POW. GLASS SHATTERS. Dirt sprays. A blue BMW this time. The Girl loves this game … her expression is slightly crazed. She reaches for another plant — There aren’t any. Her smile fades — And for a moment, just a moment, the dullness leaves her eyes and she is suddenly, incredibly sober. And tears fill her eyes as she looks over the edge –

GIRL
Yellow car.

EXT. BENEATH THE PIER – NIGHT
FOUR TOUGH-LOOKING DOCK WORKERS are camped out under the pier, warming themselves around a small bonfire, laughing loudly. Christmas decorations dangle above them from the pier, and empty beer cans litter the sand around them. An old collie is tied to one of the pilings. The dog is being tormented by the dock workers. They flick lighted matches at him. Shake their beers and spray him in the face.

These guys are not rocket scientists. The dog cowers, tugging on the rope. Tries to get away. All to the great amusement of its tormentors. One of them turns, laughing –

As a shadowy FIGURE strides calmly up to the fire:
Long hair.
Cigarette dangling from-lower lip.
Shirt-tails hanging loose below the waist.
Nothing threatening in his manner as he plops down beside the men, smiling.
They are immediately on their guard.

RIGGS (FIGURE)
Happy holidays. Mind if I join you?

PUNK #1
Yes.

PUNK #2
Fuck off.

Riggs smiles at him innocently. Strokes the collie’s fur with one hand. With the other, he reaches into a paper sack and produces, a spanking new bottle of Jack Daniels, possibly the finest drink mankind has yet produced.

RIGGS
I need help drinking this. Cool?

The dock workers exchange glances. There seems to be no harm in this. One of them frowns:

PUNK #1
You a homo?

RIGGS
Do I look like a homo?

PUNK #1
You got long hair. Homos got long hair.

PUNK #3
I hate homos. Arrggh.

Riggs shakes his head, laughs.

RIGGS
Boy, you guys are terrific. You make me laugh, you just do.

At which point, appropriately enough, Punk #4 shakes a beer and sprays it in the old collie’s face.
The DOG pulls away, WHINING.
Riggs leans forward.

RIGGS
This your dog? Nice dog.

And then, he proceeds to do a peculiar thing: He starts to talk to the dog — in what seems to be the dog’s own language. Very weird, folks… He coos, snuffles, barks softly, then withdraws, listening, his ear to the dog’s muzzle. Riggs nods. Frowns. The others look on, puzzled. Then Riggs looks at each of the four dock workers.

RIGGS
Huh – You know what? He says he doesn’t want you to spray beer in his face. He says he just hates that.

A pause. Uncomfortable. Then –

PUNK #1
Oh, he does … ?

Screenwriter David Marconi also likes the em-dash, as noted in this scene from Enemy of the State

INT. CRYSTAL CITY, VIRGINIA, TALL OFFICE BLDG. – DAY
A well-appointed big-city law office filled with citations of merit and pictures of a wife and child. ROBERT DEAN, a likable young lawyer, sits behind his desk with his back to an OLDER MAN. He stares at a commanding view of Washington, D.C. as he listens to a tired, smoke and whiskey voice.

OLDER MAN (L.T.)
I don’t know how much longer we can hold out, Mr. Dean.

DEAN
I don’t know, either, L.T. Maybe you guys should get yourself a labor lawyer.

L.T.
Well that’s why I’m here, Mr. Dean. ‘Cause you’re a labor lawyer.

DEAN
Good point.

L.T.
Last night, Larry Spinks, he works the Steel Press, he goes to a bar with his wife Rosalie to have a glass of chianti ’cause it’s his birthday, and these two guys, these Guido mother-fuckers, they jump him when he goes to the bathroom.

DEAN
L.T., in this office I’d prefer you say Italian-Americans.

L.T.
I’m sorry, Mr. Dean. But Larry’s in St. Lukes now, so I’m a little — I’m not myself. The Union bosses say unless we take Bellmoth’s offer, it’ll only get worse.

DEAN
That’s because your Union bosses are those Guido mother-fuckers.

L.T.
I don’t under –

DEAN
The Union’s trying to railroad you into accepting terms worse than what you have now.

L.T.
Why would the Union –

DEAN swivels around in his chair and faces L.T.

DEAN
Because they’ve been paid off by Bellmoth.

L.T.
Mr. Dean –

DEAN
My name’s Bobby. I’m your lawyer. Don’t do anything ’till I talk to you.

DEAN gets up and walks a grateful L.T. to the door, calling to his secretary as they go –

DEAN (CONT’D)
(calling)
Martha! Larry Spinks, St. Lukes. Send him a case of chianti from the firm. And send his wife Rosalie some flowers.

The Montage

A montage is a group of shots that compresses time to encapsulate an experience or convey exposition or backstory – such as montages showing the development of a couple’s relationship in a short period of time or the hero preparing for the big battle (for instance the classic montage from the film Rocky, depicting the protagonist training for the big fight – doing push-ups and running up the steps of the Philadelphia Art Museum.)

When done well, a montage can move a story forward, increase anticipation and even add comedic effect. Where I see screenwriters getting into trouble with montages is when they forget that a montage is a storytelling device and insert them into scripts with no rhyme or reason simply because they don’t know how else to convey the drama or they want to indicate time passing (such as moving from spring to autumn – you don’t need a montage to do that!) A montage should only be used if it adds to the narrative thread. And they should be kept to a minimum – one montage per screenplay is sufficient.

If you are using a montage in your story you want to ensure it:
1. Contains information that needs to be summed up quickly
2. Adds directly to the story
3. Moves the story forward

Check out Christopher Riley’s book The Hollywood Standard to learn how to correctly format a montage.

YOUR TURN: Do you have a favorite (or least favorite) movie montage?

Entering the Story: The First 10 Pages of a Screenplay

The first 10 pages of a script are the most important – that’s the amount of time you have to convince a reader to continue reading your screenplay. If you haven’t presented an engaging and riveting story by then – chances are you’ve lost your reader. He’ll either be bored or confused, or both.

In the first 10 pages (roughly 10 minutes of film time) you want to introduce, in a clear and compelling way, specific story elements that will entice a reader to keep turning the page.

Often those essential elements include revealing, introducing, or addressing:
* The protagonist
* The antagonist (or providing evidence of the antagonist’s existence)
* The central conflict
* The stakes
* The setting or “world”
* The tone

Here’s a look at the first 10 pages of Terminator 2: Judgment Day. The script, written by James Cameron and William Wisher, hit all the “essential” elements within the first few opening scenes.

Pages 1 – 3:
Central conflict and dramatic question introduced
Stakes revealed
Tone set
“World” presented

Rows of cars jammed bumper to bumper in downtown Los Angeles. The scene dissolves to a hellish landscape revealing a heap of fire-blackened human bones and cars. The rush hour crowd burned down in their tracks. A title card reads: LOS ANGELES, July 11, 2029. Beyond is a playground with a half-melted jungle gym, a warped swing set, a sagging merry-go-round, and a burnt and rusted tricycle. A female VOICE speaks:

3 billion human lives ended
on August 29th, 1997. The survivors of the
nuclear fire called the war Judgment Day.
They lived only to face a new nightmare,
the war against the Machines…

Metal humanoid machines with glowing red eyes and massive battle rifles hunt the dead terrain. A battle rages between the machines and a ragtag guerrilla army. The humans are mowed down. A female voice speaks:

Skynet, the computer that controlled
the machines, sent two terminators
back through time. Their mission:
to destroy the leader of the human
Resistance… John Connor. My son.
The first terminator was programmed
to strike at me, in the year 1984 before John
was born. It failed. The second was set
to strike at John himself, when he was
still a child. As before, the Resistance
was able to send a lone warrior. A protector
for John. It was just a question of
which one of them would reach him first…

Pages 4 – 8
Antagonist and ally introduced
Conflict increases
Tone expanded
Additional information regarding the “world” presented

The parking lot of a truck stop. An electrical current strikes between two tractor-trailers. In the sudden flare of light a muscular, naked figure emerges. He enters the truck stop diner to obtain clothes and transportation. His strength and invincibility is demonstrated as he takes on a group of tough bikers and easily subdues them all. He electronically assesses the damage – determining he has caused no deaths. Exiting the premises with his treasures (a leather ensemble, biker boots, and keys to a Harley), he is confronted by the diner manager who holds a shotgun. The Terminator calmly takes the man’s weapon… and his sunglasses. He slides the shades on and rides off on the Harley.

Bridge overpass. A young police officer exits a squad car to investigate the electrical disturbance. A flash of light… then the cop is attacked from behind by a muscular, naked figure (clearly another guy sent from the future). Cool and expressionless, the man-from-the-future slides into the squad car, now wearing the police officer’s uniform, and uses the computer to locate an address for John Connor.

Pages 8  – 10
Protagonist and additional ally introduced
Conflict continues to rise

Garage of a suburban house. A 10-year-old John Conner (ripped jeans and long hair) and his friend Tim repair a dirt bike. A hard rock song blasts from a boom box. We learn John is living with his foster parents – and he considers them “dicks”. He disregards both his foster mother and father’s commands to clean up his room, and instead speeds off on his dirt bike.

Pescadero State Hospital for the Criminally Insane. Security guards patrol the exterior. A muscular, determined, and defiant Sarah Connor uses the steel furniture of her cell to do pull-ups. A group of medical interns led by Dr. Silberman peer into her room.

EXERCISES TO HELP YOU ENTER THE STORY EFFECTIVELY

1. Read the opening scenes of your script and identify which essential elements are revealed in the first 10 pages or so – you don’t want to “force” your story, but obviously the more “essential” elements that are presented early in the script the more likely the story will capture and hold a reader’s interest.

2. Review the first 10 pages of your script and describe, page-by-page, what happens in the story. Is what happens in the first few scenes engaging? Is the presentation of what’s happening in these scenes arranged effectively to provide the most impact or could what’s happening be presented later in the story to allow for more essential elements to be revealed earlier?

3. Read a few of your favorite scripts (or watch the films) to see how the screenwriters entered the story. Note which elements were presented in the first 10 pages and how they were revealed. Did the screenwriter do an effective job of hooking you within the first 10 minutes?

Setups and Payoffs

Set-ups and payoffs create an engaging and satisfying experience for the audience by allowing them insight into the story as it unfolds. In a setup, knowledge is hinted at. In a payoff, the knowledge is revealed. Often, the set-up leads the viewer down the wrong path, while the payoff leads the viewer to an “a-ha, now I know what that meant” moment.

A setup must be subtle enough that the audience doesn’t see what’s coming around the corner, but strong enough so that the audience can make the connection to the earlier clues when the reveal is delivered.

In The Sixth Sense, screenwriter/director M. Night Shymalan provides plenty of clues (setup) to the ultimate reveal (payoff). Here are just a few from the film:

Setup: After the scene in which Dr. Malcolm Crowe (Bruce Willis) is shot, no other characters talk to him, engage with him, interact with him, or even acknowledge him – except for his young patient, Cole.
Where the set-up leads the viewer: Shymalan deftly tells the story in such a way that most viewers do not even notice that no one interacts with Crowe.
Payoff: Crowe’s dead – no one can engage with him except Cole, who is capable of seeing dead people.

Setup: Crowe’s wife Anna is distressed, depressed, and distant – she behaves as if her husband doesn’t exist.
Where the set-up leads the viewer: It appears to the audience that Anna is upset because her husband is focused on his work and not paying enough attention to her.
Payoff: Crowe’s dead – his wife is sad and lonely because she misses her husband.

Setup: Whenever Crowe is in the presence of other characters they become cold.
Where the set-up leads the viewer: One of the “rules” of Shymalan’s story is that people become cold when a ghost is present and since the story focuses on a kid who sees dead people, the audience assumes a ghost is lurking about.
Payoff: Crowe’s dead –characters become cold in his presence because he is the ghost in the scene.

Setup: Crowe travels everywhere by foot or bus
Where the set-up leads the viewer: Walking or taking public transit is pretty innocuous behavior – however, several other characters are shown driving cars (including Cole’s mom Lynn, Anna’s male admirer, and guests at Kyra Collins’s funeral), making it apparent that it is common-place for people to drive in this story. This is one of the points where, combined with the other clues, many viewers most likely began to unravel the mystery.
Payoff: Crowe’s dead – he can’t drive a car and is forced to accompany Cole to Collins’s funeral via bus.

A reveal is not a payoff unless it has been effectively setup.
1. Review the major reveals of your script. Are they payoffs? If not, create setups to deliver the payoff.
2. Review the setups in your script. Do they each payoff? If not, either pay them off or eliminate them.

YOUR TURN: How are you using setups and payoffs in your screenplay to offer audience insight into the story?

Four Ways To Foreshadow Conflict

To foreshadow conflict means to indicate or hint at the difficulties that will arise later in the story. Foreshadowing creates suspense and tension; the audience knows something’s going to happen – they just don’t know what or when. A story’s conflict is best foreshadowed in the first act, in the second and third acts, techniques for creating rising conflict are used to drive the story forward.

Here are four ways to foreshadow conflict in your script:

1. CREATE DIFFICULT CIRCUMSTANCES
All scripts are driven by conflict. Setting up a story that is rife for discord and problems, with characters that must engage in struggles with one another or themselves in order to reach a final resolution, is the first step in foreshadowing conflict.

In the first act of the film Aliens, an inexperienced Lieutenant, a sleazy corporate guy, a creepy “synthetic person”, a group of young gung-ho marines, and a psychologically-scarred woman who survived a previous alien attack are thrown together on a mission to find why contact has been lost with a settlement on a remote planet – you just know something bad is going to happen.

2. SHOW CHARACTERS’ REACTIONS
When character’s react negatively to a situation – showing fear, stress, anxiety – it heightens the tension for the audience. In Aliens, Ripley’s response to being asked to become part of the group going out to check on the settlement (where she previously encountered the deadly alien) is immediate and emotional, “You want me to go back out there? Forget it!” We also see Ripley having recurring nightmares about the aliens.

3. SHOW THE UPCOMING OBSTACLES
Show the audience the problems, difficulties and troubles that lie ahead for the characters – doing so causes the audience to worry about what will happen to them. This is an especially effective technique when the protagonist is unaware of the obstacles but the audience knows what’s coming up (in Superman, the audience knows that Lex Luther has obtained kryptonite to use against the protagonist, but the hero is unaware of the trouble in store for him.)

In Aliens, screenwriter James Cameron provides plenty of foreshadowing using this technique:

* During the insurance investigation, Ripley tells the story of what happened to her and the crew of the Nostromo

RIPLEY
Look, I can see where this is going. I’m telling you those things exist. Kane, the guy that went in, said he saw thousands of eggs in that ship. Thousands… Just one of those things managed to kill my entire crew.

* Ripley retells the story to the marine crew to prepare them for what they may encounter

* While patrolling the med lab on LV-426, the crew discovers two living alien specimens in containers

* The crew finds a young survivor, Newt, who tells Ripley her family is dead and provides this foreshadowing dialogue:

RIPLEY
Newt, these people are soldiers. They’re here to protect you.

NEWT
It won’t make any difference

4. USE PROPS
When you show a dangerous item or an ominous situation – a gun, a knife, a walking trail alongside a steep cliff with no guard rail, a car that continually breaks down, a door that sticks shut – the reader will remember it and anticipate the conflict to come.

At the same time, if you use this device you need to pay it off. Paraphrasing playwright Anton Chekov: If you show a gun in Act I, you need to fire it in Act II. Props need to be set up effectively – not just for foreshadowing purposes but also for clarity and flow. If a character suddenly draws a gun to shoot her philandering husband in Act III, and the reader never saw or heard about the weapon until page 110, the reader’s going to be distracted wondering, “Where did that come from?”

In Aliens, the audience is shown numerous dangerous props
* Ripley learns how to use the loader prior to departing for LV-426
* Hicks gives Ripley a deadly weapon and shows her how to use it
* Ripley gives Newt a tracking device to wear at all times

YOUR TURN: What techniques do you use to foreshadow conflict?

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